I forget but not forgive

ME: I was so angry to stay ard him (& hence the grp of pple). N now I’ve to spend Mickey’s Xmas party all alone in Disney. I juz dun get it how does he bear to lie repeatedly & exploit a person who regards him as a true friend & treat him with respect & sincerity…?

MY ROOMIE:
Honestly, ppl may seem nice & fine till they are given the opportunity to be selfish. U’d be surprised how many ppl if not all r selfish. it’s ridiculous! I couldn’t ever believe it. It’s so true that u have to search and search to find good ppl... and unselfish ppl. Sometimes and I say this from experience good ppl have to try hard to not b selfish.

try to take this as a learnin experience cuz what I had to realize is u cant put urself out there as much. Ur so nice and u did a lot 4 him and I hope he can appreciate it. But knowingly or not he took advantage of u. and he may not have meant to, but the fact is he did. U r something special and he couldn’t realize what he had. It’s up to him to change it but u can def find more loyal friends who will value and appreciate u. u may not realize it but u r unique. Ur so nice and that’s not as common as u think. May be it’s good that he’s leaving. It gives u a chance to make new friends and tho u should b nice not b too giving so ppl will take advantage of u. J and hopefully we can hang out more nxt sem.

pple like my roomie, Jelly, Eel, Pea and Ape heal gushing wounds that are carved deep by people’s malignance and warm me when I’m freezing inside out. the world is not truly ugly, afterall, with their presence.

Being either forgiving or resentful are too energy consuming, therefore I choose to forget.

And I know I’m good at it.

Xmas is coming... Merry Xmas & Happy New Year to the loved ones.

Seeing the world through a crimson veil

there's nothing like feeling tears freeze, literally, on the cheeks in a hot and sunny afternoon. it's... it's... ahh, i'm so lost for words.

...

i'm tired of the exploitative relationship among people. and i turn to the sheltered bay where i anchor my heart but horrified to see it's beyond my reach.

then i saw your nickname, 'Comes The Dawn'. you know, i'm convinced that you are psychic or telepathic sometimes to understand and ease my pain without any form of communication. perhaps, this, as surreal and idealistic as it appears, is the connection that i seek in people. consequently, i give myself the opportunity to be disappointed again and again and AGAIN because no one, no one that i know of, has mastered the skill of listening to the wind like you do.

when i fished through my email inbox, this popped up. and it brought me to tears.



you have no idea how grateful i am to know you... to sense that you are still the same you after all these unsettling years.