A msg to you... & myself too

i've really given up this time
it's getting very tiring.. mentally. & i cant see the way out
i'm not going to cling to the illusion
when clasping memories tightly is bad enough


u may or may not know wat i'm talking about... or even may or may not see this. still, i want to type it out, as an affirmation for myself too.

Feeling.. bored...?

Feeling bored?
Feeling really bored?
Then you are welcomed to bomb AJ.
Any casualities is deeply regretted.
But sacrifices have to be made to uphold one's sanity


Feeling depressed?
Wanna commit suicide?
Then email
aj_reality_chat@yahoo.com.sg
Or better still, come & stay in AJ!!!!!
Your desire will be fulfilled,
When someone is feeling excruciatingly bored... muahaha

the credit goes to BABOON!!!! cos she really speaked my mind & inspired me to finish this for her. muahahahaha~! BABOON i love u... WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! ur eccentricity has obviously influenced me, not to mention tt i'm mentally unstable recently. WAHAHAHAHAH~


ps. i'm planning to camp in aj's quadrangle.

My testimonial...

i'm writing my own testimonial of my jc life now. how weird. -.- zzz... it's driving me nuts to write 4 pages of crap.

"Discuss briefly why you chose your CCAs and what you learnt."

cos it's slack? cos i joined it in NYGH? & i learn to.... erm... sing?! O.o

"Are you involved in activities outside college? Elaborate."

erm... does being obsessed with drawing + reading manga count?

"What makes you unique, or at least different, from other people?"

my name. my physiology & my features.


these r juz 1/10 of the lame qns i have to crap about. zzzzZZzzZzzzz.... give the grumpy me a break. =_="""

HP book 6 & a movie....

i juz bought it this afternoon in Lot 1's Popular, at $40.59. i know it's freaking expensive but i dun care.... i need to read NOW!!! if not i will know the whole story before i even flip open the book.


it's already a MAJOR SPOILER to overhear who died in this book accidentally, & Sim still wants to tell me who actually is the half blood prince. god... =_=" so i bought the book. hopefully, it can also elevate me temporarily from my crumpling-cookie life. eeek...


--------------divider...here comes the divider------------------


i'm totally IN LOVE with Crying Out Love In The Center Of The World. i watched it with Quek last fri & it made me cry sooo much that i was almost drowned in my own tears!! i used up 1 packet of tissue yet i couldnt stop the tears from soaking up my sch uniform. >_< & i'm not the worst one. there was a gal sitting behind us, i think she almost broke down cos she was literally WEEPING & the WHOLE cinema could hear her choking in her tears. O______o|||


if most of the Hollywood tearjerker romances are up to this standard, i guess movies of similar genre will not have such bad names... ha.



i want to download the music too~~~ its theme melody really melts my heart... >_<

I hate PMS!!!!!!!!!!!

Parents Meeting Session... i absolutely loathe it.


& it seems like things that are called PMS have the same effect of getting on my nerves... may be with the exception like playing Maple Story. i thought to have PMS in sec sch is bad enough... until i come to this sch. =_=" what's the point of telling the parents? they are not the ones who will sit for the exam... & seriously, at this age, i think the parents also cant really do much but start more family wars perhaps.


pea told me she was bombarded by her parents for 3 rounds on the day she told them her results. as if this is not bad enough.... her bio teacher insisted she wants to meet her whole class' parents....


zzzz... i'm bogged down by crappy stuffs. this explains y i'm sulking recently... & Monkey boy is a wooden Mojojo... w00den MOJOJO~~~~~~~ muahahahahahahahaha~!!!!

The failure of life

i thought everyone will somehow... b good in certain areas. sadly, i don't see this happening to me. =( i can neither handle my academics well nor manage my emotions. *bang wall* i'm flunking maths tests, as usual, + not able to reach the satisfactory level for other subjects. not to mention sc0re welll.... =_=" i think as a maths retard, i need to do what i've done in NYGH, finishing the WHOLE booklet of specimen papers to save my grade from the pit.
wa... or may be i should do the TYS twice? hmm.... zzz.


& i still refuse to accept that i'm sentimental despite what jelly said. i mean juz when do u see the astrology books using 'sentimental', or words of similar meanings on ARIES???? i'm an ariessss~~~ the impulsive, assertive & passionate ARIESSSS~~~~ muahahaha~!


i also realise that having short term memory is actually a good thing. cos i tend to rmb sad things for a much longer period of time. so i'm willing to trade my short termed happiness for long termed amnesia... juz to get peaceeeeeee. now, i really want to be Dory from Finding Nemo.......

erm, so what exactly did i say i want to be juz now???? or did i even say i want to be someone???????


............. whatever.


some pple juz don't know how to cherish what they have now. like jian hao.... i think he likes grace but he simply refuses to admit or do anything about it. dots... may be he doesn't know how lucky he is to be in this situation nowww (+ he still dares to say it's embarrassing)... & he doesn't know how HORRIBLE it feels to go through all the mental sufferings, YET NO ONE KNOWS. well, may be not really no one... but it's the person...... nvm. anyway it's definitely suffering for nothing. *bang wallllllllllllll*

New layout~!

it took me days to fix the new layout as i have some major problems with the code.


i'm suddenly sick of the very bluish layout that i used previously. though, i must say, it's nice. especially it features a character from 1 of my fav manga, Angel Sanctuary. may be i'm simply not in the mood for intense & dark patches of colours.


i love simplicity NOW, both my life & my mood. cos i juz realised it's probably the only way to be happier. unfortunately, i always turn simple things complicated. ha... & i bet Nanyang Girls' High will be so proud to know that i still abide by the sch motos 2 yrs aft graduation. LOL~


one last glance at my old layout...




hmm... may be i will switch back to the old layout 1 day..haha.

Someone asked me this...

"Should I Smile Because He's My Friend Or
Cry Because Thats All We'll Ever Be?"

freaking tough qn though it's only 1 line. ok, 2 lines when it's broken up like this. guess i wont cry... juz feel sad for quite some time but appear as a happy idiot, like BABOON. LOL.

friends are still better, cos friendship is more long lasting. it sounds cliche but it's true. especially knowing lala's case..

pity

Aahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~~~~~
W$BdFB)@#%SDFJSfasW$QF!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Q#$GWBBN#%KMTEDHE^%WDGSD~!!!!!!!!!!!!

....................

ok, i feel SLIGHTLY better now.

today's the 1st day of sch.. well, technically speaking, it's term3 week2. but since it's the 1st day to have normal lessons, not some freakish common tests, so it should be the 1st day of sch.

and i finished my lessons at 6.30pm, reaching home 7.30pm.

WTH?!

it's really NOT tired to have almost 12 hrs of lessons, besides knowing all the tests & extra lessons we r going to have FOR THE REST OF MY JC LIFE =_=||| Pea said the sch is really trying to drive us nuts, not to mention she is already nuts. WOW~ see the relation? pea & nuts... WAHAHAHAHAHA.. here goes pea-nuts~!!!! ROFLMAO~~~ lalalalala~~~ ok, i'm already starting to go mad.

i will snap soon... it's juz the matter of time. or i've already done it? ha..

that's y i need an outlet for me to release all the tension, let it spread around so it will have lesser pressure on me. remember? larger area, smaller pressure? ahahaha....

i'm mad.. i know. & i think i will do this quite often & turn my blog into a =shoutbox= literally.

I only want to lead u to happiness...

=I only want to lead you to happiness, knowing i can never be yours to share it=

Jelly changed the 2nd half of the quote... & she inversed the intention & meaning of it. it becomes such a sweet quote surprisingly. haha, she's good at it. =D

=I only want to lead you to happiness... and that is where i am=

she said "feel free to use it if you want...haha. and live happy. cos sad is for those who have left you"

yes.. no one has left me & i'm very grateful of it. but i'm juz not in the mood of using a sweet & lovely nick. -.- not sure why though... may be BABOON can help me to explain. to quote from her, this is cos i'm treading the thin line "between heavenly bliss & morbid insanity" ha....

well, i will reserve the sweet version to use it when i'm... happier. =)