... I need a memory wipe

how i wish my brain is 1 gigantic memory card. So i won't get choked by my memories.

i realised when a person died, all the related memories of him will become so... elusive. the past feels surreal. was it in my head only or it did happen?? and i can't stop wondering what was the last thing on his mind seconds before his heart stopped beating.

i feel lonely all of a sudden. it doesn't help even when i'm surrounded by people or walking along Orchard road. it's the feeling of emptiness that gets stronger as day of his wake approaches. i'm so lonely... lonely .... lonely... lonely... lonely... lonely... lonely... lonely and i doubt anyone can help me.

MIA.